BUNNY FRIENDS FOREVER

 

 

There was once a little bunny called the Punisher and he loved all the children but Santa did'nt.  Santa wanted to get rid of the easter bunny but it was only one hour til easter.  So Santa crept in and took the easter bunny and everyone wonderd were he had went.  Every other bunny went looking for him and they saw Santa with him so they grabed him and ran.   After they got back he delivered all the chocolates in time.   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE MAGIC BOX

 

On a sunny day Mr Fiswijet was walking down the street and he saw a lane and he thought it was a short cut so he went down it. It was quite a long lane and he was almost at the end and he saw a ditch in the ground. He just walked past it but then he thought something had caught his eye. Mr fiswijet walked back and he saw a gold box shining and even though it was a roasting hot day the box was freezing so he knew that he had to get something to rap it up in ,so he coverd it up with mud. Then he got a stone and scraped the ground so he knew where it was and he walked home. When he got home it was quite dark so he turned on the tv and was watching it till about 1 in the morning and then went to bed because he was tired. When he woke up he got dreesed and then he got a bag and then went back to the box it was quite dark that day and then it was hot. He tried to touch it but he burnt himself. He also knew with that heat it would burn through the bag. So he went back home and got lots of bags and went back to the box and he brought some gloves. He picked up the box and put it in the bags it was quite heavy so he went home slowly and when he got home he took it out of the bags and put it in the livingroom corner. He went to sleep and when he woke up he went down stairs and had breakfast then he opened the box.

 

When he opened it lots of smoke came out and when it went away there were 3 people standing there. One of them is called Alexandera RPG he is a night and he is a very good swordsman and axeman. Scarface was so cool he has lots of money and power and he gets revenge on his enimes. Saints Row is dangerous he has money guns and cars like Scarface Saints Rowand. Scarface like each other they were rich and they had guns and lots of cool cars. Alexsandra was not very dangerous he only had swords,axes and shealds and also armour. Mr Fiswiget was so amazed and because he opened they didnt hurt him. He fainted at the site of them. They just waked past him.

 

 

Scarface,Saints Row and Alexsandra killed all the other ganges and then the police came and killed Alexsandra. Scarface and Saints Row killed all the police and then bought all the cars,houses,shops and ground in three quarters of the world and then went into their cribs. Then they got even richer. After that they died of old age and the world went back to normal.

 

 

SELF EVALUATION

 

I enjoyed reading my story.

The parts I think are particulary strong are when they come back out of the box and the bit where Alexandra dies.

 

The words I think describe my story are well written,thrilling,mysterious and easy to read.

 

Now I am going to tell you why thrilling + mysterious - becasue the people come alive out of the games

well written - fixed all the spelling + puncuation

 

The part of the story I liked best was when they come out of the box becasue I like all the people.

 

I am pleased with the start of the story because it is the longest I ever made a story.

 

My storyline is easy to follow becasue it is simple to read.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Me and my friend Daniel have made an imaginative story called Computer Madness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

narator,                Daniel and Josh are computer geegs but they only have one computer to share. They always fight over it and one time it got violent.

 

josh,                       I want on the computer so give give me a shot or ill cry and tell mummy.

 

 

 

daniel,                        No I still have fifteen minutes left anyway.

 

 

 

 

narator,                        Their mum came in and saw them hitting each other.  She splitt it up and sayed no one goes on the computer until you resolve it and she put them in the kichen.

 

 

josh,                              I will let you on the computer until im back from school.  Agreed.

 

 

 

 

 

daniel,                             I agree to that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

daniel,                               You get on the computer until thirty minutes till bed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

josh,                                I agree as well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

narator,                            Im proud boys.